CUPPA Tea – CUPPA Coffee
By John G. Kelly john@activeretirement.ca www.johngkelly.ca
The entire front page of the February 2025 issue of the Atlantic magazine, an iconic source of contemporary public opinion in America, was devoted to a screaming headline “The Anti-Social Century”. It was accompanied with caricatures depicting loneliness spanning the entire age spectrum from genZ to seniors. The article provided a reader-friendly in-depth account of the extent to which a combination of factors ranging from the isolation associated with suburban living, a car-dependent culture, and social media was alienating Americans from their community. Americans, and by that I mean North Americans on both sides of the border, had lost touch with neighbours and their community. To put it bluntly, we’re anti-social. We’re living in a “home alone” environment as a former suburbanite in the Greater Toronto Hamilton area (GTHA) nodded my head in agreement upon reading the article.
But it also brought a smile to my face. My wife Susan and I aren’t living in a home alone environment. We left the suburbia lifestyle behind and are living in Saint Andrews. It’s a classic “Norman Rockwell” type community that’s focused on neighbours being neighbours and embracing community living.
Think of all the British movies you’ve watched where a neighbour just drops in on a neighbour for a “chat”. The first thing the host suggests is that they’ll put on the kettle so they can share a “CUPPA”. A nice cup of tea is the ice breaker and the chat becomes a shared experience. You get a warm feeling just watching the scene and wistfully wondering how you could experience that in your own personal life.
Well, Saint Andrews is a CUPPA friendly community. Neighbours often invite neighbours to drop in for a cuppa. But there’s more to it than just one to one CUPPAs as enjoyable as they are. There are “cuppa community” gatherings of all sorts in Saint Andrews. The town has several bistros that are natural cuppa gathering spots.
I belong to a men’s CUPPA group that meets bi-weekly at the Honeybeans Bistro and Café. It was easy to join. I just showed up. Honeybeans is the real deal that chains like Starbucks desperately try to imitate. The bistro has a wide variety of personalized teas and coffees and homemade muffins and cakes if you want a cuppa and a bite. If you show up regularly the staff gets to know you and you’re greeted with a smile and hello. There’s no rush because having a cuppa with the guys is all about letting go and relaxing, something that so many men forget how to do during their career days and need to relearn. There’s no formal meeting agenda because this isn’t a meeting. It’s a bunch of guys getting together and getting to know one another over a cuppa.
A CUPPA group in Saint Andrews isn’t a guys thing. My wife belongs to a women’s cuppa group that meets once a week at Honeybeans to just talk the talk. And talking the talk isn’t about gossip. It’s about sharing what’s going on in your life with others.
There are CUPPA groups in Saint Andrews that are learning focused. A neighbour decided she wanted to brush up on her French once she moved to Saint Andrews. She found out there was a conversational French cuppa group that met weekly at a downtown coffee shop. She just showed up and was welcomed to the group. The group just talks the talk but it’s all in French. It’s a fun way to make friends and a relaxing way to learn since the talk is all focused on a fun learning experience.
Want a CUPPA experience? Experience Saint Andrews.